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Wednesday, December 31, 2008

pepperoni pizza and peanut butter

hmmmmmmmm...today is the last day of 2008...i'm kind of glad it's finally over...it's for changes...time for me to turn over new leaves...make my bed and never get back into it...LoL...well anyway...it's just time to be different...this has been a very tough and trying year...i've had people i've considered "friends" talk crap about me and then they acted as if nothing was the matter...but i can't expect much from them anyway...they talk mess about their "best friends" all the time...running their mouths all the time...but that was a lesson learned...this is the exact reason why i don't like to let people in...i just end up getting hurt...but this year WILL be different...i'm trying and learning how to let things out and not keep them in...cause it's only killing me and it's only breaking me down...and i know i have a million and one people who would be willling to sit and listen to what i have to say but sometimes i just feellike if i tell them what's wrong or what's bothering me...i'll just be burdening them with my issues...so i let it go and don't bother them with my problems...but yeah...i went to my friend's kwanzaa celebration on dec 26th...and i didint think much of it...we usually talk about which one of the 7 principles that we want to follow for the following year...and i always pick KUJICHAGULIA which means SELF-DETERMINATION (To define ourselves, name ourselves, create for ourselves and speak for ourselves) but i never follow it...which is ironic because of it's meaning...i wasnt at all determined this semester...i lost all motivation to do anything...i had no drive...but i plan to make this year a better one...i want to have mucho KUJICHAGULIA for the coming ssemester and year and years to come...i will make it my duty to do a better job i felt like i was such a b!tch to sooo many people recently...and i never meant to be that way...i've just been going through so many things this year and i don't know how to express it...but this year i'm gonna make a pact to change those ways...and get rid of some of the things/people who caused the negative changes in my life...well anyway...goodbye '08 and hello '09

Sunday, December 21, 2008

Just Like Me...

Soooo...Jamie Foxx has a new single out with T.I. called "Just Like Me"...I first heard the song a few days ago...even though it's probably been out for a while...but I don't listen to the radio or watch BET or MTV...my tv is usually on channel 33...NiCKELoDEoN...and if I'm online...I'm usually on AIM or Facebook...well any whos...I heard the song and thought that it was really nice...really cute...something I could sing along to...and what gave it like 30+ points was that I loved the beat...sometimes I listen to the beats and bases of the song more than I do to the lyrics...and the video was just as cute and funny...leave it to Jamie to have you laughing non-stop...it was kind of hard to listen to the words and watch the video at the same time...pick one or the other...well here's the video...ENJoY!!!



Just Like Me (Official Music Video) HQ - Jamie Foxx Ft. TI

Monday, December 8, 2008

Be Blessed

Sooo...this week has not been going so well for me. It's been really busy and hectic. I was in two performances back to back this weekend. C.S.O.'s Fashion Show on Friday and the Stony Brook's Gospel Choir's concert on Saturday. Then I just found out that I'm a whore-slut-bag-skeet-skeet on campus. Sooo that's just great and I'm really excited about that!!!

I can't deal with this right now...finals are coming up and I need to focus on that...not on who is talking about me.

I think what's hurts more than the accusations is that the girl who I found it out from knew from last semester and never said anything...and when she does bring it up...it was on a day that I was not at work to defend myself. I think that's crazy because she has my number...my screename...we work together. So I don't understand why she couldn't tell me herself...without a million people being around...a whole semester later.

I really want to transfer from this school...I never even wanted to come here from the beginning...so this puts the icing on the cake...but even if I did want to transfer where would I go...I definetely do not want to live at home. So as much as I am broken, hurt and wounded right now I just have to move on. I know who all of my friends are.

I titled this post BE BLESSED...because of Yolanda Adams' song. The chorus goes "Be blessed/Don't live life in distress/ Just let go/ Let God/ He'll work it out for you/ I pray/ that your soul will blessed/ Forever in his Hands/ For you deserve His best/ No less"
I am going to continue listening to that song and lean on God because you can't depend on anyone but Him.



Be Blessed - Yolanda Adams