pepperoni pizza and peanut butter

hmmmmmmmm...today is the last day of 2008...i'm kind of glad it's finally over...it's for changes...time for me to turn over new leaves...make my bed and never get back into it...LoL...well anyway...it's just time to be different...this has been a very tough and trying year...i've had people i've considered "friends" talk crap about me and then they acted as if nothing was the matter...but i can't expect much from them anyway...they talk mess about their "best friends" all the time...running their mouths all the time...but that was a lesson learned...this is the exact reason why i don't like to let people in...i just end up getting hurt...but this year WILL be different...i'm trying and learning how to let things out and not keep them in...cause it's only killing me and it's only breaking me down...and i know i have a million and one people who would be willling to sit and listen to what i have to say but sometimes i just feellike if i tell them what's wrong or what's bothering me...i'll just be burdening them with my issues...so i let it go and don't bother them with my problems...but yeah...i went to my friend's kwanzaa celebration on dec 26th...and i didint think much of it...we usually talk about which one of the 7 principles that we want to follow for the following year...and i always pick KUJICHAGULIA which means SELF-DETERMINATION (To define ourselves, name ourselves, create for ourselves and speak for ourselves) but i never follow it...which is ironic because of it's meaning...i wasnt at all determined this semester...i lost all motivation to do anything...i had no drive...but i plan to make this year a better one...i want to have mucho KUJICHAGULIA for the coming ssemester and year and years to come...i will make it my duty to do a better job i felt like i was such a b!tch to sooo many people recently...and i never meant to be that way...i've just been going through so many things this year and i don't know how to express it...but this year i'm gonna make a pact to change those ways...and get rid of some of the things/people who caused the negative changes in my life...well anyway...goodbye '08 and hello '09

Just Like Me...

Soooo...Jamie Foxx has a new single out with T.I. called "Just Like Me"...I first heard the song a few days ago...even though it's probably been out for a while...but I don't listen to the radio or watch BET or MTV...my tv is usually on channel 33...NiCKELoDEoN...and if I'm online...I'm usually on AIM or Facebook...well any whos...I heard the song and thought that it was really nice...really cute...something I could sing along to...and what gave it like 30+ points was that I loved the beat...sometimes I listen to the beats and bases of the song more than I do to the lyrics...and the video was just as cute and funny...leave it to Jamie to have you laughing non-stop...it was kind of hard to listen to the words and watch the video at the same time...pick one or the other...well here's the video...ENJoY!!!



Just Like Me (Official Music Video) HQ - Jamie Foxx Ft. TI

Be Blessed

Sooo...this week has not been going so well for me. It's been really busy and hectic. I was in two performances back to back this weekend. C.S.O.'s Fashion Show on Friday and the Stony Brook's Gospel Choir's concert on Saturday. Then I just found out that I'm a whore-slut-bag-skeet-skeet on campus. Sooo that's just great and I'm really excited about that!!!

I can't deal with this right now...finals are coming up and I need to focus on that...not on who is talking about me.

I think what's hurts more than the accusations is that the girl who I found it out from knew from last semester and never said anything...and when she does bring it up...it was on a day that I was not at work to defend myself. I think that's crazy because she has my number...my screename...we work together. So I don't understand why she couldn't tell me herself...without a million people being around...a whole semester later.

I really want to transfer from this school...I never even wanted to come here from the beginning...so this puts the icing on the cake...but even if I did want to transfer where would I go...I definetely do not want to live at home. So as much as I am broken, hurt and wounded right now I just have to move on. I know who all of my friends are.

I titled this post BE BLESSED...because of Yolanda Adams' song. The chorus goes "Be blessed/Don't live life in distress/ Just let go/ Let God/ He'll work it out for you/ I pray/ that your soul will blessed/ Forever in his Hands/ For you deserve His best/ No less"
I am going to continue listening to that song and lean on God because you can't depend on anyone but Him.

Be Blessed - Yolanda Adams

C.A.F.E.

Since today is the first day of December it's only right that I start off by saying that there are 24 days left until Christmas...even though Christmas really isn't as exciting as it used to be...like how it was 10 years ago when I was 9...



But anyway...back to more important newz. December is AIDS awareness month...so get out and get your RED pins...



I'm involved with an organization on campus called S.A.B. (Student Activies Board) and this week they are having a series of events for AIDS Awareness and one of them that I helped to create was called C.A.F.E. (Changing the AIDS Face Effectively). At this event it will be a cafe theme...where we will show slides and pictures of people affected by the AIDS virus with various performances including spoken word, acting, dancing and singing.

I think it is very important and we shouldn't just wait until December to talk about AIDS because it's affecting so many people out there. The age group being affected is getting lower and lower...it's no longer 18-24 but 13-17...and that is just horrendous.

But I am not trying to lecture anyone...just be safe. You may be just one person but you can make a difference. It may not be to millions of people but your actions or words just may have an affect on one person.

apathetically of course...

Hey Everyone...well hopefully it won't be just me reading this...so I say EVERYONE...LoL.
I'm new to blogging...but I feel like posting notes on Facebook is like blogging...so it shouldn't be very hard to do right???

Well I titled this post as well as the blog, "apathetically of course" because lately I've been feeling like I just don't seem to care about people or anything anymore. I've been feeling really apathetic and there is a song called, "Hypothetically," and in the chorus he [Lyfe Jennings] goes "...hypothetically of course there are some things better left unsaid..." and I thought it was catchy. I guess it's also cause of the stress I've been going through lately...but I'm feeling a lot better now...I went home for Thanksgiving break and I got to get away from school and leave campus...oh yeah I go to Stony Brook University in Long Island.

So I'm not really sure what else to write right now...so I'm gonna end this post at it's current status. But I'll be back later to post something new. Hasta Luego...